Multiple preparations, multiple interviews- the question remained unanswered. From the list of interview questions asked, this was the one I dreaded the most. I knew in my heart- and from a very young age- that I wanted to be a doctor but I couldn’t answer the question why. And so with my exit from my multiple interviews, I had a feeling that neither I nor the interviewers were impressed with the answer that rolled out of my tongue. 

It wasn’t because I didn’t prepare well enough (and I’d like to state that my dissatisfaction with my reply wasn’t the sole reason I didn’t get into medical schools of my choice) but because the over thinker in me wanted it to be something grand,not merely superficial. I wanted it to be my answer and not something I got off the internet, revising over and over again because that was what every other person said. I wanted it to be real, to be from the depths of my heart, an answer that satisfied me and sat well with me, making my eyes glisten whenever I pour it out to the next person that asks. I wanted it to be an answer directed at my own ‘why medicine’!

Truth is, the answer was always there and it’s just like everyone else’s (to the disappointment of my over thinking personality)-I want to help, to be of service and I want to use my acquired knowledge and skills to do that. I know that this can be achieved in other fields and so, my answer remains partially complete. However, as I progress on, little snippets come at me, one word at a time, that I believe one day will enable me concoct a full sentence or speech as to why I want to be a doctor, granting me my anticipated grand response. 

I look back and realise that with every passing year, with every new challenge, I am gradually beginning to understand why I have been so adamant that it was medicine or nothing else, and I am so proud that I am finding out the reason at my own pace, adding to it’s originality, and not something I made up because I had to give an answer to anyone who asks.

And finally, after a lot of ups and downs, I am in med school doing the one thing I have always wanted to do-embark on a career path to becoming a doctor!